Last night I started this blog entry with the hopes of discussing how to deal with the potential death of a beloved writing project. The reason was, sad to say, I was facing the possible demise of a project I’ve been working on for several months. It’s one of the best opportunities I’ve had as a writer. I was going to solicit your prayers that the project stay alive. But now, as of 1:30 today, it looks like the final (well, almost final) nail has been hammered into the coffin. The project is essentially dead.

I’ll need to have a little time now to mourn this death and, yes, question myself and/or God. (“Did I mishear you, Lord, when I began this project?”). Then, hopefully, I’ll get some wind back in my sails again.

So I guess I’m still asking for your prayers….only now the prayers are for me to move past this death—and for God to somehow redeem the time and effort I put into this project. I’m so reluctant to let go. I find myself wanting to pray it back to life.

If you’ve been where I am now, you know what it’s like.

14 replies
  1. Shannon Dittemore says:

    Praying, praying, praying!

    My tummy knotted when I read your post, Nick. While I’m relatively new to the publishing world, I’ve wondered just what happens when a book refuses to be sold.

    The silver lining, I’ve decided, is the amount of things I learn about writing while immersed in a project. Still, that’s little encouragement when mourning is reasonably before you.

    So, I’ll pray for you! For direction. For strength. We need one another in this wacky world of writing. Thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing your heart.

    God bless!

  2. Rebecca says:

    I’m so sorry, Dad. If this is the one I’m thinking of, I know how excited you’ve been about this. I pray that you get some peace with this, and clarity in the direction about where God is leading you.

  3. Richard Mabry says:

    Nick, Although my “been there, done that” is nowhere near as deep nor as recent as yours, I can still sympathize. Indeed, I will continue to pray for you my friend: for your writing, for your editing, and for your amazing ability to encourage writers–even those whose book covers don’t have bonnets.
    Blessings and peace.

  4. Judy Gann says:

    Nick, you know that I’ve been there with my Cuddle Time project. It’s hard to let go, isn’t it? But, God has a plan, even though we don’t see it. I’m praying for you during this time of grief as well as trusting the Lord to provide you with fresh direction.

  5. Lori Stanley Roeleveld says:

    Set a period of time where you’ll allow yourself to grieve, give in to the grief and then declare the time of mourning over. You love the Lord and you know He works all things together for good for those who love Him. The grief is real and God is with you in your sadness just as He was when you prayed about beginning your project just as He will be when one day you know what it was all about. I mourn with you, Nick. It’s not easy to lay a dream to rest.

  6. Lynn Dean says:

    So sorry you’re walking through this today. In times when it seems a dream has died, I take comfort in knowing that Jesus also died, but that didn’t mean there was any mistake. And the Lord raised Him again in His time. It doesn’t always happen that way, but there is hope. After mourning comes morning.

  7. Michael K. Reynolds says:

    This reminds me of the passage where Jesus chided the crowd when they were mourning the death of a child. “She’s not dead, she’s only sleeping.” Perhaps it’s just not in God’s timing but will come back later in a different and more exciting form. We have a tendency to bury things before their time. I am sorry for you Nick. That’s always difficult.

  8. Nick says:

    Thanks everyone.

    I’m feeling some peace about it already. I leave early tomorrow morning for a conference. Time away will be good. Maybe I’ll have something to report when I get back.

  9. Steve G says:

    Hope your conference went well. I do know, that God uses these things to make us more like Himself (Romans 5:1-8 comes to mind) – and He will invariably use this down the road in one way or the other. The balance for me has always been: Is this something I fight for something because I need to do it and the difficulties are just interference from the “dark side”, or is this a case the door is being closed by the “Big Guy” and I need to look for a different open one he is leading me to? (and my wife would say, “Just let me be sad for awhile – don’t try to fix it. I know all that, but it just hurts right now.”)

    Prayed today your way would be clear.

  10. Cathy Elliott says:

    I, too, am so sorry to hear of your loss. It’s obvious you feel it keenly. But we know that with God, nothing is wasted. Not all the intense work you’ve achieved or the way you feel right now. He can use it all for His glory.

    And who knows? One day, this project of your heart may be resurrected for His perfect time. I hope so. What a story that will make!

    Meanwhile, joining the chorus of prayer.

  11. Louise Carey says:

    I am inclined to agree with the others who mentioned that the project you are currently mourning may someday be resurrected in His timing. And if, per chance, it is not, the hours of work will not be a wash—our God is a redemptive God!

    I am so thankful that your book Magnificent Prayer did not die before it came to fruition. It is such a blessing—everyday! Sometimes I try to imagine how many hours of research and writing went into that book. It had to be an enormous amount of time. I’m thankful that you put in all those hours and that Zondervan picked up that project and published it.

  12. Nick says:

    Thanks everyone. Today or tomorrow I will have the phone conversation that will likely seal the fate (one way or the other) for this project.

Comments are closed.